Aging Groupie Alert!

I skipped my run this morning, a combination of freezing rain, icy streets and me not being a big fan of concussions. Such things can't be helped.

But now it looks like the evening run will be deferred too, a combination of Van Halen playing at the local neighborhood arena and me not being a fan of smacking into Budweiser-fueled, post-menopausal groupies.

With "Jump" in their hearts and Geritol in their purse, these overstuffed obstacles to free-flowing sidewalks present the most fearsome threat to my aerobic exercise program since Jane Fonda's tapes. Maybe I'll mess with their tiny minds and go spit off the balcony. They'll think it's still raining.