Fast, Faster, Fastest

I'm happy to see my new Great Plains home make this list. So did the Great Suburban Outback. And my favorite college town. And a place or two that’d be cool retirement hangouts. I’m FAST, man. Speedy Gonzalez. Ricochet Rabbit. Road Runner.

Fast everywhere…except in the pool. Or on a bike. Or running. Or pretty much anywhere on a triathlon battlefield. But despite being old and decrepit, I'm treacherous as hell. So after you've gone out too fast and blown up on the run, maybe around mile 11, I'll get ya. All you'll see is my bony ass receding into the distance...slowly.